Thursday, November 10, 2016

Finally Darick Robertson Donnerstag again

It´s been a while since I did a post on Darick Robertson´s birthday mostly because he was still doing that super hero bashing Garth Ennis THE BOYS bs. Thankfully that´s over so we pay homage to one of my favorite artists.


Well, it´s been a long while since I posted - period - and I spent most of the day writing the necessary job applications to fulfill my monthly quota.

Which was a neverending battle. Regular readers of the blog may know that I spent the last three weeks doing a course about how to apply for jobs successfully and may think that this would be easy as pie. But like I say : ninety percent of the things you learn never survive the first enemy contact. Because when you are taking these courses you have all the necessary programs on the computer but when you try to do it at home your laptop doesn´t have any PDF composers or Excel or Word or any of the other MS Office stuff. So the first thing that I did was download a PDF program because the only finished PDF I had was all my credentials with my curriculum and my picture BUT with an application letter for a certain job offer. And I couldn´t send this to any other job openings. So I wanted to make a new PDF file with everything except the job application letter.

I managed to download a PDF maker but I couldn´t get it to work and after I got rid of the trojans it had infested my laptop with I deleted it again - only to find the activation codes in the spam mail folder. Then I tried to get a free MS Office trial version which would not help me much because it would have been only a 30 day trial version and that means it works this month and maybe I can even use it for next month but after that I have to look for another solution. Since I had to finish the job applications Today by hook or by crook I went for it but to get the free trial version you have to get a Microsoft account and for some reason Microsoft blocked me.


To add another wrinkle to it all the links to free jobs I had mailed to myself during the course didn´t work when I tried to use them so I had to start looking all over again. Also my job agency case worker had decided to up the ante so I had to write five job applications per month instead of four.

Which doesn´t sound like much of a problem at first but when you have difficulties finding even four - and you have to keep in mind that you have to do it every month. Now while I was doing that I received the latest comic order from my online comic shop which should have helped me to forget all my troubles for a moment. And for the most part it did. I may not have had the time so far to make the announcement but I think I´m going to do another big Christmas Contest this year IF nothing else goes wrong. To that end I had made the new comic order as I have already gotten all the FREE COMIC BOOK DAY comics I was interested in and could finally get some free comics from Halloweenfest. But part of the order was issue two of Frank Cho´s SKYBOURNE series and that was really depressing.

WHY WE NEED MORE YAYA HAN POWER GIRL COCONUT BRA COSPLAYS

I don´t know what it is but it seems Frank Cho doesn´t WANT to succeed. After all the trouble he had at Disney and DC for drawing women who are too sexy you may think that now that he has nobody to chain him down he finally uses that opportunity. But it seems that even though he always complains about how the big two treat him he doesn´t want to rock the boat and only dares drawing hot women when he´s working on a book for the big two. I mean, even his sketch covers have more hot women than the both issues of SKYBOURNE that have come out so far - combined !


One of the Top Twenty comic covers I would like cosplay queen Yaya Han to re - enact ( she already has the Power Girl costume ) - post pending !


But really, a few days ago I read Frank Cho´s issues for the new unbearable Hulk and compared to that his new series seems to be sponsored by the catholic church. If something doesn´t happen in the next issue I´m out.


I´m sorry, I really want to support Frank Cho but between the unreadable crap like Wolverine or Hulk he does for Disney and the uninteresting and disappointing art on SKYBOURNE there is not a lot to keep the reader entertained. And four bucks is still too much to just throw it away. 


Anyway, I managed to write the applications against all odds but it took me most of the day so this post will be a bit short. Although that should be no problem since I have already done a few Darick Robertson posts in the past so I have said pretty much all I have to say about his career.

Speaking about past Darick Robertson posts you may wonder about the title of Today´s post but I did a post in 2011 called DARICK ROBERTSON DONNERSTAG which I wrote on a Wednesday so this is the first FOR REAL Darick Robertson Donnerstag post. And since I mentioned Power Girl here is a little nugget to show my readers that comic publishers have always been stupid when artists and hot women are involved. Back when Darick Robertson was doing JUSTICE LEAGUE there was this story BREAKDOWNS and in that story Power Girl was wearing a makeshift bikini she had made herself from coconuts and some strings. At that time the artists on the Justice League books were our man Darick and Bart Sears. Now you would think DC might use the opportunity of Power Girl´s wearing a outfit that doesn´t leave anything to the imagination and put her front and center.


Wrong.

In Darick Robertson´s issue you only get to see her in a few panels and only from the side and Bart Sears, the guy who was famous for the best Power Girl there is, there was and there ever will be had to cover her up with the Martian Manhunter. God those comic publishers never learn.


Now since I have already mentioned it, not only is the cover of JUSTICE LEAGUE EUROPE 35 an homage to GIANT - SIZE X - MEN 1 which gave us the new mutant team, it´s also on my list of cover´s I´d like to see Yaya Han re - enact. Of course I would emphasize a certain part of the cover.


Yes, I´d take any excuse that gets Yaya Han to wear a really small coconut bra. With her huge 40Ds she would rock it better than Jennifer Aniston.


Well I can still dream, can´t I ? It´s not like Yaya Han hasn´t done risky cosplay photoshoots before. And she definitely has the body for it.


Okay, after this long tangent let´s get back to the main reason of the post : Darick Robertson´s birthday. I can´t tell you how old he is because for some reason nobody seems to know on which year Darick was born.

WE NOW CONTINUE WITH OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAM

As always this is a subjective selection of covers and art and isn´t meant to represent all of Darick Robertson´s work. As I mentioned I wouldn´t touch THE BOYS with a ten foot pole and I haven´t read his recent stuff.


Since I didn´t do a Darick Robertson post last year there are still some links I haven´t posted yet, starting with interviews on 13TH DIMENSION and COMICS ALLIANCE and a post about New Warriors 50 on WHAT JOE WRITES . For some Justice League Europe 101 COMIC BOOK RESOURCES divulges how the changes in Arnageddon 2001 ( because readers guessed the identity of the mystery villain they had to change it ) destroyed the Breakdowns story and THE DANGER DIGEST also covers that story line.

I also mentioned all the problems Frank Cho had and since I haven´t done a post about that - once you start with this it goes on and on and I don´t like doing posts just to bitch about stuff - I´m putting the links here. I think things really started with Sam Maggs on THE MARY SUE who tells Frank Cho Just Because You Can Doesn´t Mean You Should while Frank Cho´s reaction to that was telling feminists to shut up and go away . Of course that caused an uproar and Spider - Gwen creator Robbie Rodriguez called out Frank Cho totally crossing the line ( which is a bit weird looking back at it seeing how she is drawn lately without so much complaining since they got the publicity they wanted ) and looking at it objectively Spider - Gwen is a derivative character that´s not even very original.


Because I was curious I got the True Believers issue and even at one dollar I felt cheated because it had some of the worst art I have ever seen. Okay, you know things are starting to disintegrate when people like Rob Liefeld comes to the defense of Frank Cho and J. Scott Campbell ( who also had come under attack ) and calls for a stand against artists being crucified .

You think that after all this Frank Cho finally learned his lesson but then we hear about Frank Cho leaving Wonder Woman after Greg Rucka complains about a variant cover showing too much skin . I am at times amazed how much people still get worked up about all this stuff and seemingly still don´t understand what the difference between a variant cover and a regular cover is. There is a very enlightening interview with Erik Larsen, the creator of the best super hero comic out there Savage Dragon, on REAXXION about women in comics and sexist costume designs which clearly shows that all the bandwagon - hopping, attention - seeking social justice warriors have no clue about comics, comic history and real life. No, really, nobody like these uninformed egocentric bigots and even the entire entertainment industry says " no more " to social justice warriors .

Speaking of the entertainment industry, Today´s celebrity birthday round up starts with sexbomb extraordinaire Athena Massey who turns 49. While you might have seen her on Seinfeld or Black Scorpion she is best know for playing sex starved cop Cindy Hannen in the cineastic masterpiece Undercover Heat. If you haven´t seen the movie I wrote more about it in this year´s birthday post of cult siren Elizabeth Berkeley where you can also find more animated GIFs of Athena Massey in totally NSFW action.


Speaking of Elizabeth Berkley she was on Saved By The Bell with sexbomb Tiffany Amber Theissen as was Michael Jai White who also celebrates his 49th birthday. Other hot co stars of Michael have been Lorenzo Lama´s wife Kathleen Kinmont in Renegade, Catherine Bell on J.A.G. and Kiana Tom in Universal Soldier 2 - The Return ( he also was in the first movie ).



As far as comic book credits go Michael Jay White played Bronze Tiger on Arrow and did voices on the animated shows Static Shock ( I didn´t even know there WAS a Static Shock cartoon ), Justice League and Batman : The Brave And The Bold. He also appeared in The Dark Knight, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II : The Secret Of The Ooze although to 90s kids he is best known for playing the title character in Todd McFarlane´s epic Spawn.


With Vanessa Angel who turns 50 there are a few comic connections although I´m not sure if the tv series Weird Science counts since it only had the same title as the EC comic. Another sci fi role was Anisa / Freya in Stargate SG 1 although the leggy 34C bombshell is best kown as the russian sexbomb in Spies Like Us ( she was the only good part of that movie ) and the main distraction in Kingpin which was not a movie about the famous Spider - Man villain. With her comedic skills and her killer measurements I always wondered why she didn´t have a bigger movie career in Hollywood.


As you might have guessed the Sabretooth movie she was in has nothing to do with X - Men but G - Men From Hell does not only include another sci fi babe - Sliders´ Kari Wuhrer - it´s based on Michael Allred´s comic.



Which is not called G - Men From Hell because Mike Allred never got around to do that comic and put the story into four issues of Madman Comics. Just if you want to look for it in your local comic shop. You can also find the full movie on YouTube or watch the Freak Film Friday review above before you see it or read a review on A HERO NEVER DIES. Spoilers !


We are staying with comics as Neil Gaiman celebrates his 56th birthday. Which reminds me that I still haven´t bought The Sandman : Overture and I don´t know why. One of these days I will try to buy it but by then it will probably be too late. It´s almost like Neil Gaiman wrote this just for me ( longtime readers may recall that on one of my first visits to Erlangen I wanted to ask him from where Dream returned in issue one of Sandman but because I was distracted by the person at the booth where Neil Gaiman was signing I forgot and now he is finally telling that very story ).


Since most of of my Neil Gaiman videos are just him talking - and there´s nothing wrong with that since Neil Gaiman is one of the few people on the planet who I could listen to all day - here is an animated version of the first Sandman comic I ever read that introduced his sister, fan favorite death in The Sound Of Her Wings one of the best stories of all times. If you are one of the few who hasn´t read Sandman you HAVE to watch this.



I don´t know if it´s a coincidence that I mentioned Universal Soldier and Kari Wuhrer earlier because Roland Emmerich turns 61. The Stuttgart born director was the director of the first Universal Soldier and producer of Eight Legged Freaks which starred Ms Fanservice Kari Wuhrer as the hot sheriff of the little town that gets overrun by giant spiders. While that may not be very realistic it is addressed in the movie as the horndog teenagers of the town call her the sexiest sheriff in the country.

Kari is best know for her role of Maggie Beckett on the sci fi cult show Sliders. She was put on the cast as the boner guarantee for the male audience and they got more than their money´s worth in the Wild West episode where she´s almost spilling out of her snug saloon girl corsage.


She also was in Hot Blooded, a really bad movie that doesn`t even have full frontal nudity. Nevertheless it´s one of my favorite movies with Kari because she looks really hot in this one. You get to see a lot of cleavage and boobs and in the first sex scene on the bed you can see her sexy ass.

And because one scene where she´s at a gas station and pulls down her leather top to make the desk clerk horny. She´s really pulling it in all directions so you get to see her full boobs. I have no evidence but I swear I can see some nipple. I bet Kari had to do this scene a hundred times as the crew was sabotaging all takes just to see her boobs again and again.

In any case, I had this scene on a video tape on a loop and I must have heard the words " This material just doesn´t breathe ! " a hundred times.


Like I said there is no full frontal nudity in this cineastic masterpiece but you get a bit of sideboob in a scene that was heavily cut on german tv.

They cut parts from when she´s using a whip to get into the mood and pours hot wax on his body. They also cut some parts from where she´s on top of him which I didn´t know until I found the movie on the internet.

Damn you, german tv for keeping Kari Wuhrer´s sideboob away from me !


Another movie legend, composer Ennio Morricone celebrates his 88th birthday who has contributed to too many movies to mention them all here. If you grew up in the 80s like me you are probably familiar with his name from all the italo westerns he worked on, among them my favorite western, My Name Is Nobody. This is one of the few movies you MUST get in german because about fifty percent of the jokes are from the german dubbing. I once saw the movie on spanish tv and the difference is huge.


A shoutout also goes to the late Roy Scheider who was absolutely brilliant in some of the most iconic films in history like Blue Thunder and Jaws.


Since I couldn´t find any good videos about Michael Jay White ( there was a Nostalgia Critic review of Spawn but I had to take it out again because I found the review for G - Men From Hell and I try not to have two reviews in one post ) , Roland Emmerich, Ennio Morricone or Roy Scheider I get to pick a few videos from the archives. I thought about adding the video of Yaya Han cosplaying as Power Girl which I used to make the GIF at the top of this post ( which alone cost me a full day ) but as this would have been a re - post I just linked to it for those that have not seen it yet. There are a few Yaya Han videos I haven´t posted yet but none with Power Girl so I´m saving them for another time. Still I don´t want to deprive readers of the asian babe factor so here´s Hyuna performing her hit Trouble Maker.



As I have already posted a video from the cartoon series Ultraforce, based on the comic series by Malibu, in an earlier post here is a video I would have posted on Halloween : a Dr. Seuss double feature with the Grinch.



Speaking of adaptions of Malibu comics, we started this post with Night Man and I want to end in the same way. I do not know if I have not already posted an episode but it is always better to be safe than being sorry.



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You´re gonna need a bigger boat.

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